Ok, so I have been very bad.  I haven't been back to my blog for months and I have not excuse.  I could make up many but what's the use, I just am so busy with knitting, yoga, friends and family that it slips my mind.  I was reminded this evening when I saw that "Dear Introvert" was looking for writers.  I thought that's right up my ally.  I love to write and occasionally I even say something someone might be interested in.
For instance:  We have had so much going on in Charlottesville, VA lately that it's hard to keep up with.  I actually live 5 miles East of Charlottesville but it doesn't matter.  I'm in the town all the time because that where the shopping, theaters and everything resides.  Charlottesville is actually a remarkable town and I love it.  I moved here 4 years ago from Bergen County, NJ and it was the best thing I ever did.  Who knew that this kind of place even existed.  I think I've gotten off track.
I wanted to discuss these statues we have down here.  To be perfectly frank with you, I don't even know where they are and I could care less.  However, I do object to them being taken down.  I think that if we hide our history we face the possibility of forgetting the wrongs that have been committed and repeat them.  Virginia was in an interesting place during the Civil War.  It was the place where our country started but we have had racial problems way up until the 60's.  I'm ashamed that I just learned of them when I watched the movie about the women who helped solve the math problems during the war.  When I saw what was done to them, I was completely shocked.  It certainly wasn't like that in the North or I just never noticed it. In any event, I hate racism and I wish we could all return to our childhood when color meant nothing and a friend was a friend no matter what.  However, children grow up and during that time elders teach them things they shouldn't and a circle is formed.  History repeats itself because we teach it to our children.  They were not born to hate anyone. It's a sad state of affairs and I so strongly wish that we could allow the past to be the past, the hate to stop and the healing to begin.  Right now, that seems like light years away.
I have spent the evening making red hearts with a ribbon that says #HEARTS4C'VILLE in an attempt to heal this city after all the hate that was brought in here.  Those of us that live here are really mourning not only the lives that were lost but also the loss of innocence in our town.  This small community has been splashed all over the 24 hour news cycle and we've become the center of radical speech and hateful ways.  We are NOT like that and never were.  It's such a loving, gentle Southern city that welcomes you in and just embraces your presence.  All of us who live here are trying our best to move on and try to bring back the love and peace we previously experienced.  We've been attacked and it will take some time to recover but recover we will and will be an even brighter star on the map for decency and respect.
Back to making hearts to hang around our city to remind everyone of our healing process💝💝

                                      #HEARTS FOR C'VILLE

AFTER THE HOLIDAYS - THE CALM

Well, here we are in February already - the time just flies by.  The best part is that the holidays are over.  I simply hate the whole season.  My dream is to be in an induced coma from the day after Thanksgiving until January 2.  BLISS!!  I know most people would find this shocking but for me its true.  There has been so many disappointing holidays for me and ones that I spent crying my eyes out that it just isn't a happy time for me.  Now that I have a grandson, it's looking somewhat brighter but this year was no exception to the drama around the holidays.  Since I am from a divorced family or "blended family" as my daughter explained to me, there are always hurts.  My stepson from my first marriage (also half-brother to my daughter and son) decided it would be a cool thing to take a photo of the "Carafello" family.  That would be my x-husband's family, meaning him, his wife, his son and my kids minus me of course.  Apparently, his brother who lives in CA sent out t-shirts saying "It's a Carafello thing, you wouldn't understand".  They all put on their t-shirts and took this photo in my son's living room in front of me.  It's not that I wanted to part of that family anymore but  simply because they are my children.  So since there was no T-shirt for me, I was eliminated from this photo.  I was heartbroken because technically other than my husband and my kids, I have NO FAMILY.  I wanted to feel included, part of something and I wasn't.  It was hurtful that my kids wouldn't think to say, "hey, my mom should be here" They were actually angry with me for "being offended" my son said and I was left to deal.  It's not easy but as I get older I just realize that life is not what we expected it to be.  DEAL!

I have been knitting and that helps.  I have learned that knitting is sort of a metaphor for life.  You simply have to learn to accept the process.  You make mistakes, tear things out and start again hoping to get it right this time.  You simply relax and allow things to display as they will.  I'm not as concerned about mistakes or perfection anymore but just about enjoying the process of making something out of nothing.

Wouldn't this be great!  I wanted to post a photo of a couple things I've made but they are on my phone and I haven't downloaded recently so next time.  Valentine's approaches, so love each other.

Ok, so it's been many months since I last posted and I wonder why.  Perhaps it's because I simply have too much going on and forget to do it.  This morning I read this in a another's blog and just had to repost it because I thought it was such a great idea.  This person has been collecting inspiring quotes all her life.  She accidentally lost the ones from her early childhood but just starting a new collection that she now carefully backs up to be sure not to loose it again.  In any event, I want to copy her because I think it's a great idea and one that could keep me focused.  I will start with her short selection down below and then begin to make my own personal collection that I will also share with you.

Below are a few of my favorite quotes. I hope they cling to your heart because they are tattooed on mine:

1) “Almost. It’s a big word for me. I feel it everywhere. Almost home. Almost happy. Almost changed. Almost, but not quite. Not yet. Soon, maybe.” ~ Joan Bauer

2) “I am, in every thought of my heart, yours.” ~ Woodrow Wilson

3) “Trying to forget really doesn’t work. In fact, it’s pretty much the same as remembering. But I tried to forget anyway, and to ignore the fact that I was remembering you all the time.” ~ Rebecca Stead

4) “Close your eyes and imagine the best version of you possible. That’s who you really are, let go of any part of you that doesn’t believe it.” ~ C. Assaad

5) “I wanted to run / but there was just no where to go / living in a dream world / praying it don’t show / Who I am / is who they want me to be / But I’m having a hard time finding me / Don’t take my hand, darlin’ / Just let me go / I’ve gotta do this by myself / That’s one thing I know” ~ Randy Rogers, One Thing I Know

6) “Strength does not come from winning. Your struggles develop your strength. When you overcome hardships, that is strength.” ~ Arnold Schwarzennegger

7) “That’s the thing about ‘what ifs’; they don’t matter. They don’t change anything. All they do is make it unable for you to heal.” ~ Lindy Zart

8) “Distance is not for the fearful, it’s for the bold. It’s for those who are willing to spend a lot of time alone in exchange for a little time with the one they love. It’s for those who know a good thing when they see it, even if they don’t see it nearly enough.” ~ Meghan Daum

9) “For hearing my thoughts, understanding my dreams, and being my best friend. For filling my life with joy, and loving me without end.” ~ Unknown

10) “The grand essentials to happiness in this life are something to do, something to love, and something to hope for.” ~ Joseph Addison

In my knitting world, I am currently working on a beautiful shawl that is just about finished.  I will add a photo of the pre-finished shawl below.  The colors are striking and so me.  I can't wait to finish it and be able to wear it for my Christmas holiday. 

 One year I made similar shawls for all my female family members.  I was so incredibly proud of those shawls. I put hours and hours of work into them and I could not wait to hear the ooo's and ahhhh's from everyone.  NEVER HAPPENED!!   Each person opened their packaged to a "oh that's so nice" and proceeded to fold it back up and place it in the box.  I never heard another word from any of them.  How disappointed was I - devastated.  All those hours of work and the build up to finally giving them away and nobody cared.  So I decided then and there that these women were simply not KNIT WORTHY and I would never knit for them again and I haven't.  

This is the scarf I made for my daughter.  As far as I know, she's never worn it.  I wish I had kept it because I think it's beautiful and I would certainly have cherished it and worn it.  Lesson learned. Oh and just to come full circle, that's where the positive posts will help me to cope.

Blessings, Pam

Hi Everyone,

Well, here I am again for my second blog post EVER!!  Can you believe that I actually came back to blog more.  I definitely love this concept because I love talking out loud (sort of) to the computer and it's a stream of consciousness that just feels so me.

The sign above is DEFINITELY for me.  I have so much stash yarn it's embarrassing and I don't know what to do about it.  I am seriously running out of spots to store it.  I am on the net and I get these emails from fabulous dyers who have the most beautiful colors and yarns that I just can't resist and before you know it, I'm clicking and buying.  Then the yarn comes and it's gorgeous but I say now what???  I swear people I will NOT live long enough to use all this yarn especially since I am not the most prolific knitter.  This is a little romper I made for my new grandson.  I haven't seen him in it yet but perhaps it's too big for him.  Not sure.  

Romper for Christopher below

Christopher with a bib I made him.

So as you can see, I do knit and now I make things for the grand kids and I'm also learning lace knitting which is completely new to me.  I'm not sure how I will do on that since it seems like you must really concentrate, not good for me.

Now you can see why I call myself PamKnitsToo - I do knit but I guess yoga and yarn collecting is more my thing.  This is, of course, since I've retired and have time for these activities.  I actually started working when I was 14 years old in a local 5 & 10 store behind that lunch counter.  That was interesting to say the least.  I didn't last very long because one day I made someone an ice cream sundae and the chocolate jimmies had ants in them.  That did it for me, end of my restaurant career.  

Then I moved on to the cleaners, where I worked behind the counter taking people's slips and finding their clothes for them on that rack.  Exciting business!!  I did this after school and on Saturday's.  It was fun actually because I had the pleasure of working with an elderly Jewish woman who was very caring and helpful.  She taught me a lot about life and stuff.  Her husband would come in everyday to pick her up when we were done and he was the nicest man.  So that helped me cope with an alcoholic mother at home and an absent Dad.

More about that to come.  For now it's time to move on to other things, perhaps some knitting.  Hope you enjoy my blog and my photos.  Till next time - blessings to all.

PamKnitsToo

                                                   My star dog: Abigail - Sealyham Terrier

This is my first attempt at blogging so I'm headed into uncharted territory. Since I have absolutely no idea what I'm doing, I thought I should probably introduce myself and my purpose for this blog.

My name is Pam Hans and I am a retired Executive Assistant now living in Keswick, VA. I worked and lived my entire life in Bergen County, NJ and then decided to get out of the rat race of NJ and move south to right outside Charlottesville, VA. After living 65 years in one place, it was quite odd to move to another location. Many people ask me why I moved to Charlottesville, VA and I have no answer. My husband wanted desperately to get out of NJ so we began our search for alternate living situations. First we hit Asheville, NC but that just didn't resonate with me or him. Next was Charlottesville and I just fell in love with the downtown area and countryside. We live in a gated community about 5 miles outside of the town where horse farms are common place and the countryside is magnificent. I realized once I was here that I was probably meant to live in a place like this my whole life. I feel so much calmer, like I can finally breathe. Who knew that a person's surroundings could affect there life so much. Certainly not me. So here I am in a new locale, no job, my husband working from home and now what??

Well, I knew that I would feel like a fish out of water if I didn't plan out something for myself. So before moving day, I contacted the local hospital and signed up to volunteer there. I wanted to have someplace I needed to be. That has worked out perfectly. I also volunteer for the local Hospice of Piedmont down here and that's totally rewarding. That was a beginning!!

I was fortunate enough to meet a lovely woman in a local yarn shop and we became friends. We decided to start a knitting group in our neighborhood to meet every Wednesday afternoons from 1:00 - 3:00 pm. We have been doing that ever since. We have just three full time members but others come from time to time. I also belong to a knitting group at the same yard shop on Tuesday's. So this keeps me knitting. The ladies are MUCH MORE experienced at knitting that I am but that's okay, it's not about who's better but just about being friends who enjoy the same hobby.

I am also BIG into yoga and do that 2-3 times a week depending on my schedule and how I feel. I love yoga and happen to be very flexible, so it's good for me to do. I have two different yoga studios that I attend and have made friends there.

As I said in my blog statement, I call my blog "PamKnitsToo" because I do many other things but knitting is so important and fulfilling. I have a 4 month old grandson that I'm busy knitting for these days and a 3 month old step-granddaughter. Life is good in Keswick, VA and I am HUGELY grateful for all I have and where I am.

More to come about life growing up in NJ - not as pretty but it happened.