Well, here we are in February already - the time just flies by. The best part is that the holidays are over. I simply hate the whole season. My dream is to be in an induced coma from the day after Thanksgiving until January 2. BLISS!! I know most people would find this shocking but for me its true. There has been so many disappointing holidays for me and ones that I spent crying my eyes out that it just isn't a happy time for me. Now that I have a grandson, it's looking somewhat brighter but this year was no exception to the drama around the holidays. Since I am from a divorced family or "blended family" as my daughter explained to me, there are always hurts. My stepson from my first marriage (also half-brother to my daughter and son) decided it would be a cool thing to take a photo of the "Carafello" family. That would be my x-husband's family, meaning him, his wife, his son and my kids minus me of course. Apparently, his brother who lives in CA sent out t-shirts saying "It's a Carafello thing, you wouldn't understand". They all put on their t-shirts and took this photo in my son's living room in front of me. It's not that I wanted to part of that family anymore but simply because they are my children. So since there was no T-shirt for me, I was eliminated from this photo. I was heartbroken because technically other than my husband and my kids, I have NO FAMILY. I wanted to feel included, part of something and I wasn't. It was hurtful that my kids wouldn't think to say, "hey, my mom should be here" They were actually angry with me for "being offended" my son said and I was left to deal. It's not easy but as I get older I just realize that life is not what we expected it to be. DEAL!
I have been knitting and that helps. I have learned that knitting is sort of a metaphor for life. You simply have to learn to accept the process. You make mistakes, tear things out and start again hoping to get it right this time. You simply relax and allow things to display as they will. I'm not as concerned about mistakes or perfection anymore but just about enjoying the process of making something out of nothing.
Wouldn't this be great! I wanted to post a photo of a couple things I've made but they are on my phone and I haven't downloaded recently so next time. Valentine's approaches, so love each other.
